What is the number one question I get asked most often?
“How were you diagnosed with breast cancer? How did you know?”
December 7th, 2023 is a day I will never forget. I heard my phone ringing, and when I saw my doctor’s name on the screen, I already knew. Taking a deep breath, I answered, bracing myself for what was coming.
“Sara, I got your biopsy results. I’m so sorry. I wish I had better news. The biopsy shows you have Pleomorphic Lobular Invasive Carcinoma. It’s a type of breast cancer.”
There was a brief silence, then I asked, “Okay, what’s next?”
Hearing “You have CANCER” may come as a shock to some, however my reaction to the news was blasé in a sense that I was being told something I already knew. The signs had been there for a while. One night after a shower, I felt a lump that seemed off. I mentioned it to someone, but their response was, “It could be something else, don’t worry about it.” But I trusted my instincts. The next morning, I called my doctor.
The mammogram confirmed what I feared, though the report didn’t explicitly say “cancer.” I was 100% convinced, and a couple weeks later my biopsy simply confirmed it on paper. My biggest worry was not even about the cancer itself—it was about how I would tell my family, friends, and colleagues. I wanted to help them process the news without burdening them with what was to come. I was so focused on their comfort that I had not shed a single tear for myself.
Being a nurse, my whole life had been about helping others. Now, I had to be the patient. Letting go of control and passing the baton to my medical team was difficult, but I was fortunate to have such a skilled and compassionate group of doctors, nurses, specialists, social workers, and healthcare professionals caring for me.
Treatment Begins
Being a cancer patient felt like navigating a maze. Each appointment started with bloodwork, see your oncologist and then meet with your support team, which could include a nurse, pharmacist, dietitian, social worker or study coordinator. After that comes the treatment—IV chemo drugs—once completed, you go home to endure the side effects. This routine goes on for months.
Every three weeks, I would receive chemo, and it sometimes took a week and a half to recover. I often wondered how other cancer patients who needed chemo more frequently managed to get through it. But as cancer patients, we endure it for our families. We fight for more moments—another kiss, another hug, another day.
I remember one night reading my daughter a bedtime story. I was in pain and nauseous, but I wouldn’t move until she fell asleep in my arms. Those moments kept me going. I didn’t want to miss a single heartbeat.
The Ups and Downs
Physically, my body was put through the wringer. I had multiple side effects and even had to be admitted to the hospital several times. But after every storm, there was always a rainbow. When I felt better, I would grab hold of that feeling of normalcy. I even got back into the gym, bald head and all.
In May, I completed my chemo treatments, and by late June, I had a bilateral mastectomy. Because of the type of cancer I had, it was the best option for my survival. Shortly after the surgery, I suffered complications from a severe bowel infection, landing me in the ICU for a week. At one point, lying on the bathroom floor I could feel my heartbeat slow down and felt my body slipping away. It was in that moment that, I thought the infection, not cancer, would be the thing that took me. But I slowly regained my strength and nearly three weeks later I was back in the gym. My mind was set, and I was determined to keep fighting.
July 9th, 2024 is another day I’ll never forget. My surgeon called with the biopsy report from my mastectomy.
“Sara, your biopsy report is quite lengthy and filled with a bunch of medical terms, but here’s the bottom line—you had a complete response. You don’t have cancer.”
I paused, taking it in. Then I finally let the tears fall. “After everything I’ve been through this year, I really needed to hear that. Thank you.”
“I’M CANCER FREE!”
Moving Forward
Although I’m cancer-free, I’m still in active treatment, receiving IV medication and taking oral medications for a long period of time. I’m also awaiting another reconstructive surgery pending early next year. Surviving cancer was a monumental task, but I couldn’t have done it without the support of my family, friends, my oncology team, colleagues, social media, and other support networks.
Cancer brings more hardships than just the disease itself, and no one really prepares you for that. During my treatment, I reached out to organizations like Cure and the Kelly Shires Foundation for financial aid. They were incredibly helpful, but we were also fortunate to have loving and supportive parents who stepped in to help. We needed support with childcare, meals for our family and basic household cleaning. I am forever grateful for everyone that has lent a helping hand during this time.
To my mom, who came with me to almost every chemo session and nursed me through side effects, and my dad, who visited whenever I needed him especially unexpected hospital trips—thank you. To Stephen’s parents, who were always there in a crisis—day or night thank you. To my partner Stephen, who has held my hand through hair loss, body changes, and all the struggles—thank you. And to my kids, Mommy will continue to show up for you no matter what. I love you all.
A New Beginning
These photos I’m sharing represent what I’ve been through. Yes, cancer took my breasts, but it didn’t take my life. My body is scarred, I have areas of nerve damage, and my hands and knees are weak from the intensity of treatment, but I am learning to accept this new version of me. Doing this photoshoot was one of the hardest things I’ve ever done, but it was also the first time I felt empowered and beautiful in my own skin. I owe this beautiful capture of my survival after mastectomy to my courageous photographer, Mia. She is also a breast cancer survivor and through the eyes of her lens she empowers women to feel beautiful again after a mastectomy.
I am currently part way through the reconstructive phase; however, you are beautiful no matter what you choose to do with your body post mastectomy. All that matters is that you are still “You.”
Giving Back
What I want to do now is give back to the teams involved in my care. I’m raising money for The Marvelle Koffler Breast Centre at Mount Sinai Hospital and the PYNK program, which focuses on the unique needs of young women diagnosed with breast cancer. I would also like to give appreciation baskets to my oncology team and, if possible, do something special for my family, who have sacrificed so much financially, emotionally and physically. This year was tough, and they deserve to regain some of the time we lost together.
Final Thoughts
I will continue to share updates on my journey and treatment. I’m doing my best to create breast cancer awareness, so please, screen yourself regularly. If you’re unsure, get checked by a professional. Breast cancer is the most common cancer in women. One in eight women will develop breast cancer in their lifetime, and one in thirty-four will die from it. Together, we can help save lives by sharing this message.
Thankyou from the bottom of my heart. Again, I would not have made it this far without you. Please share this post it would mean so much to me and the women out there fighting breast cancer.
—Sara
